To write or not to write..

If you and your boyfriend broke up, maybe you are trying to get him back. Or maybe, you just want some "closure" on how things ended.

A question that a lot of girls ask themselves after a breakup:  Should I try to get my ex boyfriend back by writing him a letter, explaining my feelings to him? Is this helpful at all? Let me share my views with you.

I myself went through 2 breakups in the past. The first one was after a relationship of 5 years, and the second one after 1 year and a half. I usually find it very helpful to write my feelings down on paper. A sad aspect of this is, if you write your ex boyfriend a letter expressing your inner most thoughts, or how broken you are about the situation, it will not change anything.

I'm not not trying to be negative. However, as you know breakups are happening every day, and there are some common trends in how girls and guys react to them. Guys usually don't respond very well to long, emotional letters from an ex girlfriend.

In a lot of cases though, women tend to send a letter to their ex boyfriend, hoping to get "closure". This is counter-productive.

What I prefer to do is the following: Write your feelings about your ex boyfriend down, just for yourself, to get clarity in your head about the situation. OR, post them anonymously on a forum or blog.

Posting stuff online is way better then sending a direct letter/email to the guy in question. A post on a blog site will give you inspiration to write other stuff, and will cause you to meet new people.

I you want to get over a guy, you shouldn't be writing him to make him feel as though he made a wrong decision. I believe that if someone wants be single, be with someone else, let them go, chances are, some other guy that you don't know, will come into your life and be 110% better then your last..

If your ex boyfriend uses the excuse of "going too fast and that he needs time" what he generally means, is that he is not ready for a relationship, or something better is teasing him, and he does not want to hurt you.

Just stay active, hang out with friends, don't try to hide - it will just take time to get over it.

So, if you want to write your ex boyfriend a letter, do so. Just don't send it to him! If you are looking for better ways to get a guy back, read my article on this subject and let me know what you think of it!